15 Minutes with Longevity – Healthy Marriage
In this episode of 15 Minutes with Longevity, director and publisher of Longevity Gisele Wertheim Aymes looks into maintaining a healthy marriage and keeping peace when confronted with conflict in a family setting. Gisele spoke to Beverly Milun, a self-esteem engineer, and Nikki Bush, a creative parenting expert. With the heart-sobering divorce statistics in South Africa; currently standing at 70%, Gisele asked the experts what the potential causes of family conflict are, as well as the possible solutions.
Having children was amongst many other factors that contributed to a failed marriage. Your time, energy and priorities change the moment children enter the equation, and these tend to favour the children more than it does your spouse. This can create a burden on the relationship. Beverly believes that self-esteem issues also contribute to the deterioration of a marriage; as people with low self-esteem tend to have communication problems. Beverly also stresses the point of working through things in a dignified manner. And as your children grow, so their own problems and concerns come to the fore. Helping them deal with their own conflict is fundamental in achieving a healthy marriage. Children grow up in a space between their parents, and it is your duty not to pollute that space, so as to ensure that you can help groom healthy, positive children.
Falling into a trap of making your happiness depend on other people, is another concern that is raised by the experts, as we can end up pointing fingers at the other person, instead of taking responsibility for our own emotional wellbeing. A healthy marriage is achievable it just takes the correct mindset and attitude.
Watch all the episodes of 15 Minutes with Longevity here.
Written by: Siyanda Nkala